Olaniyi “Nee” Sobomehin is a former American football fullback. He played college football at Portland State. He was signed by the New Orleans Saints as an undrafted free agent in 2008.
After being cut from the NFL due to an injury, Olaniyi decided to begin coaching and from there, in adittion to being a full time fire fighter, he has built a coaching company imnotyou.com to help young athletes be successful at an elite level.
1. If Your Mindset isn’t Right Your Life Won’t be Right
Everything in your life, good or bad, stems from your mindset and your internal beliefs. If your mindset is shit, your life will be shit, it’s that simple.
You must develop the habit of improving the quality of your thinking daily. Stop tolerating weak and amateur level behavior and beliefs from yourself, challenge all of your limiting beliefs that say “I can’t do this” or “I’m not worthy.”
Quit complaining and making excuses and just get to work, improve your mindset and build the life of your dreams.
2. Begin Your Morning in the Right State
One of the habits nearly every successful person follows is a powerful morning routine. How you start your days plays a huge role in the outcome of your days, and your days control the outcome of your life, so if you want to take control of your life, take control of your mornings.
Some habits you can begin instilling into your morning routine for rapid results are:
1. Affirmations: Tell yourself that you are the best over and over, and over
2. Meditation: Quiet your mind and get present and focused for the day ahead
3. Read: There is almost nothing as important as educating yourself, read, read, read.
4. Exercise: Get the endorphins going and the blood flowing
3. Eliminate Things That Are Distracting You From Your Goals
We live in a digital age where big companies capitalize on creating products that distract us from living our lives. If you want to be truly successful, you must begin to ruthlessly eliminate things that distract you from achieving your goals.
Do you really need to spend hours on facebook each day for “Business,” is the next episode of Breaking Bad really more important than your dreams and aspirations?
Start eliminating distractions so that you can fill your life with real experiences and real achievement and impact.
4. Read as Much as You Can
One of the cornerstone habit of every successful individual is massive self education. The most important investment you can make is in yourself, and reading is one of the easiest and least expensive ways to do that.
Begin incorporating an hour of reading or listening to audiobooks into your life every day. Fill your head with the thoughts and life lessons of the greatest people who have ever lived and watch the quality of your life transform.
5. To Get Good Results You Need Good Emotions
Your emotions are either helping or hurting you, there is no in between. If you want to see exceptional results in your life you need to have an exceptional quality of emotions.
Learn to control how you feel in each moment. Understand the affect that sleep, exercise, posture, diet, and even your clothing has on how you feel in each moment and begin to build a lifestyle conducive to positive emotions.
6. Stop Being a Bitch aka Own Your Situation
Whenever you find yourself allowing circumstances and negative emotions to rule your life, or whenever you begin playing the blame game, stop being a little bitch and own your situation.
You are where you are because of the actions you have (or haven’t) taken. You are responsible for your life, no one else. When you take 100% responsibility for your life, there is no one left to blame, and when there is no one left to blame you can begin living the life that you were born to live.
Cole is an author, investor, award winning speaker and entrepreneur. He is passionate about truly living life, creating massive financial success for himself and others, and most importantly, giving back. Cole has taught tens of thousands of people to be more than just alive, but to become the best versions of themselves, create massive profits, and then impact others by living a life of significance.
Having barely escaped death 2 times in 2 separate accidents, Cole has a true appreciation for life and lives it to the fullest. He loves boating, is a water sport enthusiast, adrenaline junkie, drives fast cars, is a husband, father, and philanthropist. Cole’s story of losing everything, even temporarily his ability to walk, to now having monumental success is truly inspirational.
1. The World Teaches Life Wrong
Society, the media, friends and even family have taught you the wrong way to go about doing life.
We are all taught from a young age that if we just go to college, get good grades and a good degree, then find a safe secure job and work our asses off for 20 years, then we will be ok. We will be successful.
We’re taught that success is about keeping up with the Joneses, having a bigger house, a faster car, a bigger credit card max, or sending your kids to a more prestigious private school.
But what we aren’t taught is that success is really about doing things that you love. Success is about finding what you are passionate about and good at, finding your God given gifts and then applying those to live a life of impact.
Success is about having fulfilling relationships, meaningful work, joyful experiences, and leaving a legacy. And if big houses and fast cars are a part of that for you, than more power to you. Just realize that there is more to life than society’s definition of success, and keeping up with the joneses and working that “secure” job until you retire is a one stop ticket to a life of regret.
2. Focus on Creation
If you want to succeed in life and business, then start focusing on creation. Spend more time focusing on how you can create better content, create more value in the market place, and create better resources for people and spend less time worrying how you can “get” more.
Business is about creation, it’s about adding value and building something that your audience wants and needs.
3. Eliminate Distractions that Prevent You From Living Life
Facebook, Twitter, Netflix, Porn. All of these, when taken to extremes are nothing more than distractions that will prevent you from living the life of your dreams.
If you want to be successful and live life on your terms, you must begin to eliminate distractions and toxic activities/individuals that are poisoning your life. If you constantly find yourself wasting hours on Facebook, block it. If you are always watching Netflix, cancel your subscription for a while.
(Do realize that after a long day of working on important things and getting crap done, you have earned the right to crash with some Game of Thrones of The Walking Dead, it’s when it prevents you from achieving desired results that it becomes an issue)
4. Surround Yourself With Top People in Your Industry
Success leaves clues, it’s not an accident or an art, it’s a science.
If you want to be as successful as you can, you must surround yourself with other individuals in your industry who are achieving at a high level. Figure out what they are doing and copy it. As Picasso said “Good artists copy, great artists steal.”
You must realize that success is not a solo venture, you need mentors and accountability in your life and by surrounding yourself with people achieving on a higher level you will basically shortcut your way to success by avoiding pitfalls that they made and finding the things that worked and doing them that much quicker.
Jimmy Tomczak lives a mission to design, inspire, and connect. Jimmy founded Tombolo, a social enterprise that partners with designers to create innovations with impact. Made in the USA, Tombolo’s eco-beach gear encourages people to get outside and live.
His work’s been featured in The Wall Street Journal, Entrepreneur Magazine, CNN, Mashable, and more. Jimmy also consults with companies on brand strategy, business development, and the creative process. A University of Michigan graduate, StartingBloc Fellow, Crain’s 20 in their 20s honoree, and lover of all things adventure – one of Jimmy’s favorite things is a good bonfire, preferably by the beach with friends and fun.
1. Be Willing to Let Go
Our lives are so full of clutter and unnecessary baggage that often times, it is by decreasing the things, commitments and relationships that we are able to increase our happiness and fulfillment in life.
So often we get attached to unhealthy ways of living, even going as far as to wear it as a badge of honor. The wall street CFP working 80+ hours a week, barely able to keep himself awake without stimulants, the young entrepreneur running multiple companies and allowing his relationships to fall into the ground, and even the college student trying to balance too many different commitments, must learn to let go if they want to be happy.
Learn to live with less, learn to say no more, be willing to say yes more. Live your life and don’t let it be dictated by the things and responsibilities you have.
2. True Entrepreneurship is Seeing the Need in the Market
While nearly anyone can become skilled enough to own and operate a business, it takes a special talent and gift to be a true entrepreneur, someone who sees a need in the market and acts on that need.
The entrepreneur is not just a business owner and a business owner is not necessarily an entrepreneur. Entrepreneurship requires innovation, hustle, and a high tolerance for risk taking. Entrepreneurship requires you to find a need in the market and fill it.
3. Get Outside and Live
Too many of us spend our days, weeks and lives in a tiny little bubble filled with nothing but social media, Netflix, work, and bar hopping Friday night. To quote William Wallace “All men die, not all men truly live.”
If you want to live a happy, fulfilled life, get out there and freaking live! Go on a hike, take an adventure, get lost, talk to a stranger, life is too damn short to spend in fear and mediocrity…get out there and live!
5. You Don’t Need a Board Meeting You Need to Connect
One of the biggest mistakes in business today is that there is no connection between people. They spend millions on retreats and meetings when they should be investing their time in getting to know, love, and connect with their employees.
Life is all about relationships, and if you want to live a great life, you will learn how to become a master at connecting with others and building great relationships.
Honored by several professional associations, Dr. Barton Goldsmith is a multi-award winning psychotherapist, a syndicated columnist and radio host, as well as a recognized keynote speaker. He has appeared on CNN, Good Morning America, Fox & Friends, CBS News, NBC News, Beauty and The Geek, The Ricki Lake Show and The Mancow Muller Show.
1. Get Really Good at Asking Questions
One of the keys to being good at relationships is being good at asking questions. People love to talk about themselves and when they find someone who is good at asking them about their life and appears genuinely interested, you become the most valuable person in the world.
The key here is that you are genuinely interested. If you are just asking questions to make conversation, it will show. Treat every person you meet like a great mystery you are trying to solve and discover one clue at a time.
2. Run Through the Best, Worst and Likely Case Scenarios in Your Head
Whenever you get paralyzed by fear, run through the best case, worst case, and likely case scenario in your head.
If you are an exceptionally shy guy at a bar, and you want to go talk to that beautiful girl over in the corner, ask yourself; what the best, worst, and most likely thing to happen.
The best case is probably that she falls head over heels for you, you get her number, set up a date..maybe even sneak a makeout session in. The worst case is that she tells you to piss off, maybe she spills a drink and makes a scene, nothing you won’t recover from and likely a great story to share with your buddies later that week.
The likely case, however, is that you go over, have a pleasant conversation, get her number and part ways.
When you dissect a situation in this way, you make it seem much more doable and less frightening. The thing is, the best case is great, the worst case isn’t that bad, and the likely case makes the uncomfortable action worth it.
3. Don’t Be Afraid to Learn and Use Stupid Jokes
One of the best social tactics for arguments, disagreements, and awkward pauses is to become great at comedy. Watch stand up comedy, start reading satire, just expose yourself to new content that you can use later on, you will be glad that you did.
4. Get a Vision for Your Life
If you don’t know where you are going, you will end up somewhere else entirely. It is essential to your success in life and relationships that you have a vision for your life, that you know what you want as an end game and start moving towards it.
Maybe you don’t know exactly what career path you want, where you want to live or who (if) you want to marry, but I am assuming that you want to have as much health as possible, as much wealth and freedom as possible and as much love as possible?
Start moving towards those things and don’t stop.
5. Family is Everything
At the end of the day, relationships are all that really matter. Don’t give up your family and the people who love you for money or fame. Always prioritize being a good husband, son, and father above everything else.
Jim Wolfe shows men how to create an amazing reality for themselves that they can then share with others.
He is obsessed with reading, writing, learning, travel, and personal growth. He draws on a tremendous variety of sources to create effective educational experiences.
He tends to be science and evidence-minded, but he’s open to anything that actually works and looks for personal growth lessons in literally everything he does.
Jim doesn’t want to motivate you for a few hours or days. He wants your internal life followed closely by your external life to be permanently better after you connect with him.
1. You Need to Develop a Foundational Sense of Self Worth
If you want to achieve true internal bliss and a sense of joy that is not contingent upon your current circumstances, it is essential that you develop an internal sense of self worth that is not dependent on any achievement, external goal, or societal construct.
If you truly want to live a life that is happy and fulfilled, you must see yourself as worthy because you are you, not because of any grade, tax bracket, bench press record or relationship. It is essential to your inner well being that you derive your sense of self worth from being and not doing.
2. Success is Relative to the Individual
In a society focused on fast cars, fancy watches, big houses, and beautiful women, it is easy to get caught up in the societal definition of success instead of your own definition of success.
Realize that success is relative to the individual, there is no one size fits all and no one else can determine what success means for you.
For some people, success really is the Ferrari, country club house and trophy wife, for others it’s traveling the world and making an impact and for others it’s simply being a good father and husband and enjoying the work that you do.
Discover what success means to you and go after it with all of your heart, ignore anyone who tells you that you have to pursue a certain path to become successful and forge your own path.
3. You Can Improve Your Happiness Through Simple Practices
Science has proven that happiness is determined by a small handful of practices and mindsets, not your external circumstances or challenges. By practicing gratitude daily, focusing on things within your control, unplugging and getting present and pursuing your dreams and goals, you will increase your happiness exponentially.
4. Having a Support Group Will Help You Overcome Your Fears
One of the best ways to overcome your fears is to have a group of individuals who are around you supporting you who are willing to challenge you and push you into the things that scare you.
By surrounding yourself with individuals who are unwilling to accept low class behavior and b.s. excuses, you will put yourself in a position where you are forced to succeed because your circle of influence will leave you no other option.
If you want to become world class and live an incredible life, you will have to do things that scare you. And the easiest way to do things that scare you is to find other people who are doing and have done those same things who will hold your feet to the fire and keep you accountable.
5. Regret is Worse than Failure
We are all going to die one day, and there is nothing in this world worse than living a life so that when you come to the end, you wish you had done things differently. You wish you had been a better man, pursued your dreams, stayed with your family, or followed your passions.
Regret is worse than failure. Don’t be afraid to fail, be afraid to never try and regret your inaction.
Zan Perrion is internationally recognized as one of the most original and insightful voices on relationships and seduction in the world today. A regular media commentator, he has been widely featured in the international press.
Zan is the founder of the Ars Amorata philosophy–a celebration of the art of seduction, the rebirth of romance, and a lifelong quest for beauty and adventure. He is also a co-founder of the Amorati network of men and author of The Alabaster Girl
1. The Greatest Seduction is Authenticity
Today, there are a plethora of dating coaches and pickup “gurus” claiming that they have the secret sauce to seduction, the one line that will immediately drop panties and guarantee quick effortless sex.
However, what these so-called gurus do not realize, and where they are doing most men a disservice, is that seduction is all about authenticity. It’s about being who you are, expressing your desire unashamedly and fearlessly. It’s about being willing to open up and share the parts of you that you don’t think women will like.
If you want to be a great seducer and lover, you first have to be authentic, to be the grounded masculine man who knows who he is and what he wants in life and is openly living and expressing that on a daily basis.
Forget all of the cloak and dagger techniques and one-liners, just be real, be you, and be authentic. If a woman can’t appreciate that then she wouldn’t have been a good fit in your life anyways and you save yourself wasted effort on a relationship that would have been built upon a facade.
2. A Great Lover Appreciates the Beauty of All Women
Something many men fail to do is to appreciate the beauty in all women. Sure they appreciate the tan, fit, busty blonde, but they forget to see the beauty in every woman they come into contact with.
Any time you are talking to a girl, whether you are sexually interested or not, try to find something beautiful about her and express it. Maybe it is her smile, her body, her eyes or dress, or maybe it’s the way she laughs, her passion, her kindness, her gentle spirit.
There is beauty in everyone if we will just look, and the world would be a far better place if more people were able to see and acknowledge the beauty within every person with whom they interact.
3. A Boy Looks for What He Can Get a Man Looks for What He Can Share
The true difference between, a boy and a man is simply the focus they have.
A boy looks for what he can get; sex, money, prestige, status, fulfillment etc etc. a man, however, looks for what he can give. He comes into every interaction looking for ways to lift others up and to share himself, to make others feel beautiful and loved.
A man is content in himself and doesn’t need the validation of others. He is already full, and as a result he can pour out into others lives without holding back.
4. There is Great Beauty in Women if You Continue
Many guys have been screwed over by women. We have opened ourselves up and put ourselves on the line only to be burned and hurt.
After this, we became jaded and angry, stereotyping all women as mean and deceitful, failing to realize that like all other generalizations, one isolated incident does not account for a whole populations actions.
If you want to be successful with women and in life in general, you must realize that there is great beauty if you will just continue. Yes, there are women who are simply mean and hurtful, but the vast majority are beautiful creatures, incredible treasure chests of beauty just waiting for the right guy who can come along and unlock them.
So keep going, keep being authentic and keep searching for the beauty in all women and you will find it. Like the bible says (and this is applicable regardless of you religious beliefs or lack thereof) “Seek and you shall find, ask and it will be given, knock and the door will be opened. ”
Keep seeking, asking and knocking and you will find more satisfaction and deep intimacy than you ever thought possible.
5. It’s Not About the Move You Make Just That You Make a Move
Just make a move. Stop worrying about doing the right thing and just do something.
So many guys never have success in any area of their life because they are afraid of taking imperfect action, but what they fail to realize is that no action is perfect and the only way to be successful is to continually experiment, fail, learn, and experiment again.
Don’t be afraid to fail, be afraid not to try.
A 2014 Dayton Literary Peace Prize nominated author, Christine Horner is a humanitarian and the co-founder of the What Would Love Do Foundation. Christine has been featured on many programs and is an internationally syndicated writer. When not writing, cooking, or enjoying yoga and tennis, Christine appreciates family, travel, and spending time in Nature.
Christine’s latest book, Awakening Leadership: Embracing Mindfulness, Your Life’s Purpose and the Leader You Were Born to Be, shows us that we each have an essential role to play in leading humanity toward a new era of true equality and prosperity. In the New Leadership Blueprint, it is through mindfulness that we reconnect with our life’s purpose, and finally begin to thrive.
1. When You Question Things Life Gets Interesting
One of the most important skills you can develop as a human being is to ask great questions.
Not only will this improve the quality of your relationships and how you interact with others, but it will also improve how you interact with yourself and the world around you.
Begin to question everything in your life from your beliefs about yourself, money, success, and happiness to your beliefs about society, the world, and god.
The more you question things, the more you shall discover and the better your life will be.
2. Take Time to Disconnect Daily
We live in a day and age of extreme connectedness. If we aren’t on our computers, we are on our phones, if we aren’t on our phones we are watching tv, and if we aren’t doing any of those things, we are probably sleeping.
A habit you should implement immediately is taking time every day to disconnect from your devices and get alone out in nature. Get on a walk or bike ride and put things into perspective.
Not only will the time away from your iPhone be rejuvenating, it will also help you to clear your mind of clutter and discover things about yourself and the world you never knew before.
3. All Great Leaders Have Understood that We Are All Connected
One of the common threads among all great leaders of peace (MLK, Ghandi, etc.) was the belief that we are all connected. We are all on this ride together, all sharing this human experience we are all “one.”
Understand this and it will change the way you interact with the world and those around you. You will have a new viewpoint, more compassion, more love and less anger.
Alan C. Fox has lived a long and joyful life, achieving tremendous success in many different arenas, both personally and professionally. He has advanced degrees in accounting, law, education, and professional writing.
He has expanded his commercial real estate company, ACF Property Management, Inc. into a billion dollar enterprise since founding it in 1968. He founded Rattle Poetry Journal (in 1994), a nationally renowned publication including his conversations with noted poets
Alan is dedicated to sharing his wisdom with as many people as possible through his writings, public talks, and media appearances.
1. Learn to be Authentic not Perfect
Many men have a perfection complex. They feel that unless they are perfect, they aren’t worthy of love and aren’t worth their goals. The simple fact, however, is that no man is perfect, we all have flaws and failures and always will.
Your goal as a grounded man should be to become 100% authentic, not perfect. Be yourself, don’t hide behind this facade or persona of who you want to be; this only leads to a disconnect between how people view you and who you really are.
When you are 100% authentic, when you are vulnerable and open yourself up to the world, no one can hurt you, you give your full self and allow others to take it or leave it knowing that some will love you and some will hate you.
2. Accept People Faults and All
Once you come to terms with your own imperfection, you must come to terms with the imperfection of others. As much as we hate to admit it, no woman is perfect, there is no “Cinderella.” Every woman has her faults, failures, and issues.
If you want to be a grounded man in a relationship, you must learn to love your woman, faults and all. Do not sit in judgement of them, but rather accept them, acknowledging your own faults and move forward in your relationship.
3. There Are Two “Me’s” and One “Us”
In every great relationship, there are boundaries. You are two individuals but one, you have two seperate lives but the same life. You must realize that a key component of any healthy relationship is seperation.
You need time with your friends, time by yourself, and time away to grow. You should never come to a point in your relationship where your significant other has an issue with you spending time with your social circle each week or taking a trip by yourself to do some thinking.
Accept that to grow together, you also need to grow apart.
4. Do Not Avoid Conversations About Money
Money is one of the leading causes of divorce in all marriages, and one of the greatest reasons for this is a lack of open and honest communication about money.
If you want to make a relationship work, you need to be open about your financial situation, debt, spending habits, and financial goals.
If you come into a relationship with significant debt that the other person was unaware of (or vice versa) you are starting off your lives together with contention. As Zig Ziglar said “Money isn’t everything but it is right up there with oxygen,” do not let something so important go undiscussed.
Realize that your value as a person and as a lover is not your bank account, you have more to offer a relationship than financial wealth. If you love the other person, you will find a way to work through financial issues together, but first you must talk about them and be open.
5. Take Care of Yourself First
A simple yet profound piece of advice. You cannot be all that your partner needs you to be if you are only focused on them and not yourself. What your ideal woman wants is for you to be a masculine, emotionally intelligent, grounded man, and to do this, you must first have your own life in order.
You can’t take care of someone else and love fully if your life is in shambles, you can’t commit to a healthy relationship if you are not making your own health and well being a priority above the other person’s.
Although it may sound selfish, this is truly the only way for a relationship to work. No marriage or long term committment should be two halves making a whole, rather it should be two whole people coming together to enjoy life.
Become whole before you start searching for your “better-half”
Dane Maxwell is a serial entrepreneur, the founder of Zannee and the CEO of The Foundation program. He has taken his businesses from mere ideas to seven figure companies within a brief period of 5 years.
1. All You Have to Do is Care
That’s it. All you have to do is care.
If you want to succeed at business, health, love, spirituality or any other facet of your life, all you have to do is care. You have to care about what you are doing more than you care about the next episode of American Idol or the next porn video you were going to watch.
You have to care enough to get uncomfortable, to do the hard thing, to put in the work, to sweat, to cry and to bleed until you achieve your goal.
If you want a great relationship. All you have to do is care
If you want a successful, globally impactful business, all you have to do is care.
If you want to live the life of your dreams and help as many people as you possibly can along the way. All you have to do is care.
2. Accept Devastation on a Daily Basis
On the road to success, you will be devastated. It’s all but inevitable.
Part of the entrepreneurial lifestyle, and really life as a human being is accepting that at any moment you could be devastated on either a large or a small scale. If you want to lead a happy, fulfilled life, you must learn to accept this possibility and not run from it.
If you live your life in constant fear of devastation and failure, you will never truly live. If you accept the inherent risk of this human existence and accept that devastation could occur at any moment, then you are free to live fully and openly.
3. With the Context of Unconditional Love There is No Concept of Worth
Everyone is familiar with the concept of worth. Be it net worth, social worth or self worth, we have all heard the term and are all well versed ascribing worth to everything in our lives, especially ourselves.
However, Dane suggests that we should approach this concept from a completely different angle.
If you love yourself unconditionally there is no concept of worth, you are loves no matter how you are. No matter how well your business does. No matter if you are successful in your relationships, no matter if you feel lost and unsure, or on fire and passionate.
This idea of radical, unconditional love for both yourself and everyone in your life is the powerhouse for transformation.
4. True Power Comes from Being Vulnerable in Community
We always speak of a confident man as someone who has his shit together. Someone who is unaffected by others and who feels a total independence from outcome.
In the interview, Dane suggests that real power, true power, lies in authenticity and vulnerability. Real power lies in being able to look the people who are counting on you in the face and say “Guys I’m fucking scared, I don’t know what I’m doing.”
When you open yourself up, when you are vulnerable and honest, you are confident. It shows that you are a man who is willing to be hurt, who is willing to be ridiculed and mocked and who is willing to admit his own weaknesses and shortcomings.
True power lies in vulnerability
5. How You Treat Women is Indicative of Your Character
One of the greatest indicators of a man’s character is how he treats the women in his life.
Men who treat women as party favors and objects to be enjoyed for a night before pissing off are likely the same in all other areas of their lives. Their interactions in business, health and spirituality are likely equally shallow and disconnected.
If you want to be a great man, understand a woman’s heart. Be willing to sit with her for hours while she shares her feelings without any concern for your own desires. Be willing to work at a relationship and work to connect with a woman.
If you can understand the heart of a woman, you can unlock everything else in your life.
Will Arnold is a martial art instructor, trained in Systema by former Special Operations Unit professional, Vladimir Vasiliev, and former Navy officer, Mark Jakabcsin. Systema (Russian Martial Art) is a comprehensive system of study that improves the function of all physiological systems of the body and all three levels of human abilities: the physical, the psychological and the spiritual.
Through Zen Warrior Training, Will guides practitioners to let go of fear and tension, using Systema to strengthen the body, mind, and spirit.
1. Expand Your Awareness to Deal with Fear
One of the common problems we face when up against a stressful or “fight or flight” situation, is that we narrow our awareness to the problem. We focus only on the immediate threat, stressor, struggle or issue and do not open our awareness enough to see the alternatives that are available.
The key to mastering your fear is to open up your awareness, become aware of all of the opportunities within the situation and take action accordingly.
In the interview, Will talked about his Systema training, and how whenever he would train to defend against an attacker with a knife, his focus was not on the knife (the immediate problem) but the attacker as a whole and all of the space around him (the opportunities).
We can take this and apply it to any area of our life that we are currently struggling with, whether it’s finances, health or relationships.
Instead of focusing on the problem, instead of losing perspective and forfeiting your control. Detach yourself from the situation, look for the opportunities within it and move forward from there.
2. Realize that Everything Will End
One of the most painful truths of life, and also the most liberating, is that everything will someday end. No matter how amazing a relationship is, no matter how successful a business is, the very nature of life warrants that it will someday end.
Instead of fighting this and trying like hell to change it, you must accept this and use this knowledge to live fully in each moment. Instead of stressing over a relationship and wondering whether it will end, accept that it has already ended (if not today, sometime in the future) and live fully in the moment, being present and authentic with that person.
Fearing the end of things is fearing the inevitable. In the end, we all end up in the same place, the only difference is how well we lived and how openly we loved.
3. Realize that Many Qualities Seen as Bad Are Merely Misused
Often times when men start diving into personal development we find a number of qualities about ourselves that we feel guilty of and need to change. The thing we often don’t realize is that even characteristics like aggression and over confidence have their place in our lives, but only in certain situations.
4. Happiness is a Choice
Plain and simple. Happiness is a choice you make moment to moment by what you choose to focus on. You can choose to focus on the negative aspects of your life, on the pain, heartbreak and struggle, or you can focus on the positive and be thankful even when it may seem there’s nothing to be thankful for.
Choose happiness in the moment, because at the end of the day, that is everyone’s ultimate goal. To live a life where you were happy more than you were sad, where you smiled more than you frowned and laughed more than you cried.
Argentina-born Dan De Leon is a powerhouse DJ, blending his unique brand of Tribal, Tech and House rhythms with a kinetic crowd connection to mesmerizing effect. His magnetic appeal has propelled him to performances at top venues around the world where he delivers a crowd experience that crushes expectations and leaves in it’s wake a trail of melodies and memories that live on long after the night has ended.
Dan De Leon’s debut original studio production “SHOW YOU” was signed by DJ Chus and released on STEREO PRODUCTIONS in 2007.
His many productions and remixes since then have hit the BILLBOARD TOP 10 Dance Chart and have appeared on the world’s top DJ compilations including those of the preeminent GLOBAL UNDERGROUND and the legendary TOMMY BOY RECORDS. His remix work includes numerous BILLBOARD #1’s, Top 10’s and Top 20’s for Noelia, Timbaland, Nelly Furtado, Kristine W and Debby Holiday.
1. You Can’t Rest on Your Laurels
Whenever you are an artist, businessman, entrepreneur, athlete etc. it is often easy to work incredibly hard for a success, and then allow a single victory to go to your head causing you to stop striving the way you were before.
If you want to be truly successful in any profession (especially if you are a performing artist) you must have an incredibly short term memory for both successes and failures.
The show that went great, the business that plummeted, the deal that tripled your profit…none of that matters, all that matters is that you continue gaining momentum as you move forward and not allow success to cause complacency.
2. Just Keep Moving Forward Boldly
One of the only ways to achieve massive success in life is to move forward with bold determination every single day. If you want a result, go after it with all you have, be bold, seize opportunity and be willing to lay it all on the line for one chance, one opportunity, because that may be all that you get.
3. Always be Ready
Perhaps the greatest take away from the entire interview was Dan’s focus on proper preparation. Life will often send opportunities your way at unexpected times, and it is up to you to seize them.
However, what is more important than taking the chances life gives you is being ready, is having developed yourself into the man you need to be to seize these opportunities properly.
Life waits for no man and fortune favors the prepared.
4. Create Every Day
If you want success in your life, create every day. While in the interview, Dan talked specifically about music, this is applicable to all fronts of life.
If you want to be healthy, workout every day. Want to be rich? Gain momentum in your business every day Want to run a top blog? Create content every day.
Always be moving forward on your goals and dreams and never let yourself lose momentum
Sir John Hargrave is an author, comedian, and entrepreneur. After launching one of the world’s first humor websites, Zug.com, in 1995, he went on to author two books: Sir John Hargrave’s Mischief Maker’s Manual and Prank the Monkey.
His comedy has appeared in The New York Times, USA TODAY, The Boston Globe, Businessweek, Entertainment Weekly, and more. A self-proclaimed technology geek, Hargrave has appeared on MSNBC, The BBC, Comedy Central, and The Tonight Show with Jay Leno. He lives in Boston with his wife and two children.
1. You Have to Become Aware of Your Mind & The Stories You Tell
One of the first steps to changing any habit or self belief is to become aware of it and how it is affecting you. If you want to fix problems in your romantic, financial, or physical life, you must first become aware of them.
In a day and age where we have millions of bits of sensory data thrown at us every second, it is often hard to get focused and calm your mind enough to really analyze what’s going on beneath the surface. This is where things like NLP, meditation, affirmations etc become essential.
The first step to mastering your life is to master your mind. You must become aware of all the thought processes that go through your head on a daily basis and start taking control of what you can.
2. How You See Yourself Will Eventually be Who You Become
One of the most self evident truths of life is that you become what you think and speak about most of the time. If you constantly tell yourself that you suck and that you are useless, you will eventually find that it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy in your life.
However, the same is true for positive self talk, if you are constantly telling yourself that you are the best and that you will succeed no matter what, your brain will finds ways to make this a reality in your life.
The stories you tell yourself determine your destiny. Make sure you are telling the right story.
3. Ask Why 5 Times
Perhaps the most powerful exercise that you can do to discover the truth about various situations in your life is to ask yourself why five times.
If you think that you suck with women. Ask why, again, and again, and again, as many times as necessary until you find they true answer.
You can use this in any area of your life, for any question you are struggling with, it will quickly reveal the true reasons and intentions behind every choice, question and struggle you are facing.
David Eschenlohr is a German with a Bachelor’s Degree in English from a Swedish University. He’s the author of the book Rite of Passage: Memoirs of a Survivor of the Pickup Community, in which he tells the story of a young man who descents into a vicious cycle of self-help and pickup.
His unique approach to ‘living a deeper life’ is the result of studying Zen under Master Poraj, taking seminars with the biggest dating company in the world; Real Social Dynamics, and the most experiences pickup coach in history; Alex Social, extensive solo world travel, studying culture in an academic context, furocious reading, critical thinking, and an open mind.
Originally from a small town, David has experienced some of the biggest cities in the world, and now promotes a simplistic, yet deep lifestyle which penetrates beyond social norms and superficial self-image.
1. Don’t Follow Only One Voice
Today, many people make the mistake of falling for the guru syndrome. The mentality where you fall prey to listening to only one expert or individual.
The problem with this is, that no matter how intelligent or influential any one individual is, the lessons that they teach are mass marketed and not tailored to your specific circumstances and stage in life.
For example, while the pick up theory in Neil Strauss’s The Game, may work for a young 20 something year old who is terrible with women, it is probably less effective for the young man looking for a partner to share his life with.
Fill your head with as many different voices (who have the results you want) as possible. Get your info from a wide variety of sources, and then take action based off of where you are in life and what your goals are.
2. Do Not Lose Your Authentic Self for External Goals
On the way to the top, it is easy to lose your true self to external wants and desires. It is easy to become someone that you are not in pursuit of a goal that may not even be yours.
The easiest way to ensure that this does not happen is to make sure that your goals are in alignment with who you really are.
An example that David shared was a friend of his who got into the pickup game out of a desire to meet and attract a beautiful girlfriend. Instead, by delving into pickup and getting caught up in the goals of the game, he began a lifestyle of rampant debauchery that was in-congruent with who he was.
Never lose sight of who you really are and what you want for the goals of others. Make sure that everything you set out to do is in alignment with your authentic self.
3. To Become Self Reliant, Do Your Own Thing
One of the keys to being a happy, fulfilled man is self reliance, and the key to self reliance is to do your own thing. Go your own way, blaze your own trail and create your own life.
Life is too short to allow your path to be dictated by the wants and desires of others. If you have a goal or dream, go after it with all of your heart, regardless of popular opinion.
4. Learn to be Full in Movement Towards Your Goals
Like Hal Elrod said on the very first episode of Knowledge for Men “Love the life you have while you create the life of your dreams.” It is key to realize that if you want to be fulfilled, you have to be full in and of yourself, regardless of any exterior goal.
Success is a journey and a direction, not a destination. Realize that you will never reach success, you will only move towards it. Learn to be whole and complete in yourself and with the life that you have now while you move towards the life of your dreams.
5. Screw Purpose Embrace Direction
Today, the words purpose and passion are thrown out like candy. David is of the belief that instead of believing in one linear purpose for your life, you must develop a direction for your life.
Instead of having one ultimate goal for your future, develop a direction that you want to go. A path that you want to follow. Like the point above, it is key to realize that success is not a single event but a lifetime of reaching for bigger and better things.
So screw purpose and embrace your direction.
As an overworked entrepreneur, Grunburg set out to establish some balance and clarity in his life by attempting a “bucket list” (lifestyle/non-work related) item. The goal was to enter an elite paddleboarding race and complete a 32-mile open-ocean paddle — an event known as the Catalina Classic.
He later applied the very same technique to complete another major goal, an Ironman-distance triathlon. Both were successfully accomplished, yet he had no prior experience or base knowledge — no paddleboard, no road bike, not even running shoes.
He shared the methodology with a group of fellow entrepreneurs who were looking to achieve their own BIG goals. Before long, the group was sharing terrific feedback about the process and were experiencing incredible results for themselves; from doubling company revenues to losing weight and even surfing a dream 30’+ wave (story is in the book), just to name a few. Martin Grunburg is the author of “The Habit Factor: An Innovative Method to Align Habits with Goals to Achieve Success”
1. Habits are the Measure of Your Value to Society
At the end of the day, after all is said and done, one of the greatest determining factors of your value to society will be the habits that you cultivated. If you made a habit of greatness, innovation, kindness, and massive action, then this will be your legacy.
On the other hand, if you actively cultivated the habits of sloth, unreliability, greed, and selfishness, than your legacy will reflect this.
The impact that you have on society is directly proportional to the quality of the habits that you create in your life. Focus on creating beneficial habits and eliminating the rest, and you will leave this world better than you found it.
2. Habits are a Vehicle to Achieving Your Goals
Many say that achieving a goal is the best way to create a habit, however, the opposite seems to be true. If you focus your efforts on building habits that will aid you in your journey to a certain goal, you will expedite the process of reaching the goal itself.
Take time upon setting each new goal to ask yourself which habits will be most beneficial to helping you attain the goal and then focus on creating those habits.
3. P.A.R.R. (Plan, Act, Record, Reassess)
The general process for creating new habits is to:
Plan: Decide upon which habit you want to set, and why. Make sure you have the desire to achieve this habit, and the reasons to back up the desire. Then begin with small steps.
Plan to take one small action maybe just a few times each week. So if you are trying to get healthy, drinking 10 glasses of water on Monday and Friday or going for a 15 minute job on Tuesday and Thursday.
Set the initial plan for 28 days, and at the end of those 28 days, follow step 4.
Act: The next step is to actually do the small action for the big habit. Make sure you build in room in your plan for failed days.
For example, if your goal is to wake up at 5 a.m. and your plan is to start by waking up at 5 two times a week. Even if you fail on one of the scheduled days, you will still be able to try again the next day and meet your goal for the week.
Record: Be sure to record your thoughts, feelings etx. etx. during this process. Not only will this help you to stay committed and keep your motivation going strong, but it will also help you to decide at the end of the trial period whether or not this is really a habit you want to have.
Reassess: At the end of the 28 day period, sit down and assess how the plan went. Did you feel the benefits you thought you would from the habit? Did it have the desired affect? Was it harder or easier than you thought to keep?
Based off of your assessment, you can now either set another 28 day plan, this time a bit more difficult, or you can abandon the habit all together.
Example: In the interview, Andrew and Martin used the example of waking up earlier to illustrate how this process would work. The following is a rough outline of that process.
First, you would make a plan, clearly writing out why it is that you want to wake up early and what this will do for your life. Decide on a low frequency “intro” period to this habit, say waking up at 5 a.m. two times each week, on Monday and Thursday for the next 4 weeks.
Now you take action, waking up at the prescribed times each week. You miss one or two days, and instead of failing the entire week, simply wake up early on a Tuesday or Friday, still meeting the quota of twice a week.
Each day when you wake up, you take 10 minutes to jot down how you feel about the habit process, and how you feel this new habit is serving you.
Then at the end of the 28 days, you review your notes and decide that you want to make this a permanent habit in your life. So now, you reassess and restart deciding to try another 28 days, this time, however, waking up at 5 a.m. 4 days a week.
You then repeat this process until you are waking up at the prescribed time 6-7 days a week.
By creating the habit in this way, you set yourself up for success and long term achievement as opposed to going balls to the wall and fizzling out after a week.
In 2006, Aaron Marino started a men’s image consulting firm, alpha m. Image Consulting, to help average men with simple common sense advice; aimed to enhance their image, style, grooming, fashion and most importantly their confidence. Aaron Marino has been featured in countless publications, as well as guest appearances on various television and radio programs, both locally, as well as nationally.
Throughout the past 7 years, Aaron Marino has worked with thousands of men from around the world, helping them with their personal style, grooming, fashion, image, wardrobe and even dating. Through his weekly YouTube posts, Aaron Marino covers a host of topics in the area of men’s style, fashion, grooming and even personal responsibility.
Aaron Marino has not only expanded his reach with his viral videos but also with a variety of products such as the stylesystem that was featured on the ABC’s Shark Tank.
1. Focus on Fit
No matter what your clothing budget is, always focus on fit first. A $20 shirt from Old Navy can look better than a $300 Tommy Bahama shirt if it the fit is better.
Be sure to try on different sizes of clothing for different brands and styles as a medium in one brand name may be too small in another. Realize that a tighter budget is not an excuse for bad style. Look for those few key wardrobe items and buy a quality article of clothing that fits like a glove.
2. The Goal of Style is to Increase Confidence
The ultimate goal of improving your style and your grooming is to increase your confidence. When your body looks great and your clothes look great, you are going to feel great.
When you put your best foot forward, you will have increased confidence and self esteem, and this will lead to an increase in opportunities and relationship successes.
3. Learn to Differentiate Between Constructive and Deconstructive Criticism
Any entrepreneur, businessman, or public figure is going to attract a far amount of controversy, and with this controversy always comes criticism. This criticism typically comes in one of two forms either constructive or deconstructive.
Constructive criticism, although uncomfortable, will help you to grow and improve yourself as a man and a leader. Deconstructive criticism on the other hand will do nothing but toxifiy your life and lower your self esteem.
Seek constructive criticism and cut out as many sources of deconstructive criticism as you can.
David Hamilton is the founder and CEO of Everlution, a premiere coaching program designed to help you take your life to the next level. David focuses on manipulating your perception and thinking patterns to live a more fulfilling, connected and present life.
1. Avoid Self Definition
One of the traps many people fall into is associating too strongly with anyone one group, idea or characteristic. It is very easy to base our identity out of our experiences, religious and political beliefs and goals, instead of realizing that our identity is us, and we are evolving constantly.
2. Ask The Right Questions
During the show, David did a brief “coaching” session with Andrew during the interview, and something any listener will pick up on is that David did very little talking. In fact, the majority of his coaching was merely asking the right questions and listening.
“Why do you want that?”
“What would this do for your life?”
“What feelings do you associate with that?”
Among others can help you completely reinvent and understand your world on a new level.
3. Your Reality is Based off of Your Thoughts
A key realization in every man’s life is that his reality is based almost entirely out of his thoughts and his state of “being.” Nothing that happens to you, good or bad, truly affects you until you make it so in your mind.
Understand that you control your reality by controlling who you are and who you want to be, and understand that you are constantly evolving an changing and do not try and fight this.
4. Realize that Fulfillment Comes from Who You Are
Life is complicated, and the question of fulfillment has haunted man for centuries. What is it that we can do that leads to fulfillment? Is it money, women, spirituality?
The truth is, fulfillment comes from within, nothing external will give it to you. Learn to accept and embrace this and work on building an inner world that can flow and adapt with the changing environment yet remain completely fulfilled.
Mathew Park, passionate entrepreneur, professional natural bodybuilder, author, speaker, loving husband & adventurous learner with over 15 years of experience in the personal development and training industry.
Mathew is one of Canada’s youngest and most renowned health and fitness entrepreneurs with his two companies RE7 & INBF Canada and his dedication and service to the natural bodybuilding & fitness industry.
1. Discipline is Essential to Success
If you want to achieve success, you must develop ruthless discipline. Commit to excellence and follow through. If you say you are going to workout, wake up early, read, or work on your business, you do it no matter what.
If you can create strong self discipline in your life, you will see everything you set your mind to flourish. Do what is necessary no matter what, and you WILL see the results.
2. Positive Routines are Essential to being Your Best Self
One of the most essential pieces to the success puzzle is to create powerful routines that empower you and equip you for the tasks ahead. Things like waking up early, daily exercise, meditation and journaling will boost your physical, mental and spiritual growth and performance into a whole new level.
3. Be Very Intentional About Who You Surround Yourself With
The importance of your social circle is a point driven home by nearly every guest on the Knowledge for Men show, and with good reason. One of the fastest ways to accelerate your growth and success is to surround yourself with motivated and like minded people.
Who you spend your time with often determines who you will become, so it is imperative that you are intentional with whom you surround yourself. Seek out winners and high achievers and your results in all areas will flourish.
4. Learn to Manage Your State
Managing your emotional and physiological state is one of the greatest determiners of success before nearly every important event. If you are amped up, present, and excited for the upcoming event, it will show in your performance.
Likewise, if you are nervous and worried and do not properly manipulate your state your performance will suffer.
Some of the greatest state enhancers are simply to get out in nature, meditate and journal. This will help clear your mind and bring you into the present moment.
Jack Myers is a media ecologist and chairman of Media Advisory Group, which provides economic counsel to more than 250 media, advertising, marketing, entertainment and financial services companies who subscribe to the weekly Jack Myers Media Business Report.
Jack speaks internationally on the impact of emerging media technologies on society, culture and business. He is an award-winning documentary film producer, author of four books and founder of the Women in Media Mentoring Initiative and Syracuse University Newhouse Network.
1. Be Sensitive to the Changing World of Men
Many of us men are desperately clinging to the old days and ways of masculinity. However, the fact is, for better or for worse, the role of men in society is changing.
Roles are no longer as black and white, and the expectations of men in society are no longer as set in stone. It is imperative to your success as a man in this new world that you are willing to evolve and adapt with the times.
Understand that women are wanting men to express more sensitivity and vulnerability, and this should no longer be seen as weak. Understand that being a man in the 21st century is a balancing act, and you will have to learn quickly or fall behind.
2. Society Has Not Taught You to Succeed
The media portrays men as morons and buffoons or dishonest polygamists. Characters like Homer Simpson and Peter Griffith are the mainstream expectation for men to live up to.
Unfortunately, the media has not helped men to figure out who they are supposed to be or how to balance classic masculinity and the more modern need for vulnerability.
To find role models and examples of the kind of man you should be, you have to look past the poor media portrayals and sitcom expectations of manliness to find out how to properly acclimate to the ever changing climate of manhood.
3. Learn to Communicate and be Honest
At the heart of the problem men are facing is our inability to effectively communicate. Read: Men suck at sharing.
The thing is, there is good reason for this. Men who wear their heart on their sleeves and are overly emotional are seen as weak and effeminate. Once again, this becomes a balancing act.
The key is to learn to open up to those who have earned your trust, and when you open up, be completely honest, don’t lie or hide things for fear of their repercussions.
4. Get out of Your Social Comfort Zone
One of the best ways to improve yourself as a man is to step out of your social comfort zone. If you are an A type personality athlete, then spend some time hanging out with the geeks and musicians.
If you are a straight guy, try making a couple of gay friends. If you are a more emotional and “metro” type guy, start hanging out with some of the MMA and UFC crowds.
Long story short, broaden your horizons, hang out with people who are nothing like you and see what you can learn.
On March 24, 1965, Albert Podell embarked on a 581-day, 42,000-mile, adventure-packed expedition by 4×4 across 30 countries that set the record for the longest auto journey ever made around the world. During the next 50 years Podell visited every one of the rest of its 196 countries.
Albert Podell has a B.A. in government from Cornell, was a graduate fellow in international relations at the University of Chicago, holds a J.D. from NYU School of Law, and has had successful careers as a magazine editor, director of photography, advertising-agency creative director, and trial attorney. He has written 300 magazine articles and wrote the adventure classic, Who Needs A Road.
1. Life is Fleeting Live it Full
Life is precious and short. We all live like life will last forever without realizing its fleeting nature. Embrace the now and live life like you will never live it again.
2. People are Generally the Same
Many first worlders ignorantly assume that the rest of the world is vastly different from us. We assume that they are all extremists and crazies and that anywhere beyond the first world is the no mans land.
What we fail to realize is that humans are largely the same across all cultures. We all want to live long and prosperous lives. We all want to raise our children to the best of our abilities, we all want as much health, wealth, love and happiness as we can fill into our days.
When we open our mind to the similarities that cross all cultural boundaries, we are able to interact much more deeply and intimately with people who are seemingly dissimilar.
3. You Can Live on Less Than You Think
In America, the idea of living with less is a foreign concept. We assume that to survive we need to be making hundreds of dollars a day and filling our lives full of possessions and cheap thrills.
But in the end, we are left with crap we didn’t need and shallow, base level experiences. If we open our minds to the idea of embracing minimalism and living with less, then we open our lives to a whole new level of fulfillment.
When life becomes about seizing every moment enjoying every second over accumulating more stuff, we are able to live lives of true abundance and joy.
4. Money and Time are not an Impediment to Travel
If you are creative enough, adaptable enough, and tough enough. You can travel the world on little to no money fairly easily. From staying with locals to camping to hostels, there are a number of ways that you can travel without breaking the bank.
One of the best ways to get started is by looking into work exchanges such as WWOOF or Help Ex where you work in exchange for room and board.
Michael Matthews is back for a second round in the Knowledge for Men arena! Michael is the founder of Muscle for Life, author of the bestselling book Bigger, Leaner, Stronger and the CEO of Legion Supplements.
Mike believes in a simple, straightforward, no b.s. approach to achieving the body of your dreams and favors long term consistency over short term intensity in all of his methods.
Mike is currently juggling several projects including a new book, continued work on the site, launching a Legion clothing line and creating a new smart phone app! You can learn more and connect with Mike at muscleforlife.com
1. Be Willing to Hustle
Too many people today want to achieve their dreams without being willing to work for them. If you want to achieve the life that few have, you must be willing to hustle on a level few will.
You will die and pass through history just like everyone else, and unless you hustle and create a legacy worth remembering, you will simply be another statistic. So get to work and be remembered.
2. Create Amazing Rituals
The top performers always have consistent result rituals in place to ensure their success. Experiment with your work, health and relationships to find rituals that work well for you.
Do you work best in the morning or at night? Do you write better after drinking some coffee or wine? Do your relationships flourish when you set aside one day a week for date night?
Look at what other high achievers have done and try to emulate them. If it works, then keep it, if not, discard and try something new.
3. Everything in Moderation
Just because you are working to be successful and build your best life does not mean you should deprive yourself. If you really enjoy watching House of Cards, drinking with your friends on the weekend, or smoking that Rocky Patel cigar every once in a while, then do it!
The key is moderation. Do not allow mindless entertainment and substance usage to become the norm, but rather an occasional treat as a reward for all of your hard work.
4. Don’t Just go for money
Following any career path solely because of the money is a one way road to misery. If you want to live a happy fulfilled life, then it is essential that you focus first on finding what you love. The money will follow.
5. Focus on the Basics and Keep Going
Men often try and get into the complexities and nuances of subjects before we master the basics. We can give you complicated speculation on the stock market, but can’t manage to save more than we spend. We can tell you exactly how testosterone fuels muscle growth, but can’t seem to workout more than once a month.
Focus on mastering the basics and the rest will fall into place.
6. Turn Your Car into a Mobile University
Massive self education (and applying that education) is the quickest way to be successful. Turn off the radio and plug in an audiobook next time you drive to work. Read for half an hour instead of watching tv.
If you take the time to educate yourself now, it will pay back dividends years down the line.
7. Have Realistic Expectations
Greatness takes time. Do not expect to transform yourself over night, but rather embrace the process and enjoy the ride. Success will happen if you work hard, educate yourself and focus on mastery, but realize it will happen over years, not weeks.
Gary Vaynerchuk is a leading internet marketing entrepreneur, angel investor, and founder of Wine Library TV and VaynerMedia. Gary has written severl New York Times bestselling books including Crush It! and Jab, Jab, Jab, Right Hook. He has invested in major companies like Twitter, Facebook, and Uber.
Gary currently travels all across the world speaking and teaching young entrepreneurs how to crush it, as well as always keeping an eye out for new investments and opportunities.
1. Learn to Love the Hustle
So many people work only for the dream of one day retiring to play golf on the beach. They focus on having free time and being able to live a life of ease and comfort. But no one is ever remembered for being comfortable.
As men who want to crush it in all areas of life, men who want to take life by the horns and throw it to the ground, you must be willing to hustle. Show up earlier, stay later, work harder than anyone else, and you will inevitably be rewarded.
You need to learn to love the hustle. Love working hard, love creating a legacy and building something worth being remembered for. History remembers the builders, not the vacationers.
2. Only Operate from Strengths
We’ve been conditioned since grade school to work on our weaknesses. If we made an A in math but a B in English, we’re told to work harder on our English rather than doubling down in our areas of strength.
If you want to truly be successful, find the one or two things that you are naturally good at, and put all of your effort into building those. Yes, you should learn to basics of all aspects of your career or area of study, but rather than trying to be equally good in all areas, focus only where you have natural talent.
This can be applied to all areas of your life. If you are naturally a taller, leaner guy, than running and crossfit may be good options for you, if you are smaller and more dense, maybe try powerlifting.
Realize that the quickest way to success is to find your strengths and capitalize on them. Outsource your weaknesses, do what you’re good at, and you will be successful.
3. Focus on the Long-term
Too often, we get caught up in short term gratification over long term legacy. You must shift your focus from the now to one hundred years from now.
How do you want to be remembered? What will people say about you when you die? Shift your focus to these questions, and the answers to your current predicaments are often revealed.
4. Become Self Aware
If you want to see your success in all areas increase exponentially faster than you ever thought possible, learn to be self aware. What are you good at? What do you suck at? What habits do you have that aren’t serving you?
Really pause and reflect and be honest with yourself. If you can cut through the bullshit stories that you tell yourself and be real about who you are and what your strengths are, then you will be able to live a life of tremendous success and satisfaction.
5. Its All About the Journey
On the journey to success, we often forget that there really is no destination. The destination of all successful men and women is to continue growing, expanding and improving themselves and the world until they die.
Retirement is a fools game.
For 30 years, Drew Gerber has been inspiring those who want to change the world. As the CEO and co-owner of Wasabi Publicity Inc., lauded by the likes of PR Week and Good Morning America, Gerber sparks “aha” conversations that lead to personal and business success. His PR firm is known for landing clients on Dr. Phil, Oprah, Anderson Cooper, The Wall Street Journal, Inc., Entrepreneur, and other top media outlets.
Wasabi Publicity works with companies that strive to make a difference in the world, providing the best industry leaders and change agents for the media. Drew Gerber is the author of Destination Ah-hah and CEO of the parent blog destinationaha.com
“Breath is the thread to remember everything you’ve forgotten”
1. Get present
If you want to live a fulfilling and successful life, then you need to stay in the present. It is often all to easy to get caught up in past regrets, future desires or present worries without living in the moment.
Take a few seconds before every interaction, presentation or important event and focus on your breath. Be mindful of your surroundings, appreciate the beauty around you. This will not only allow you to focus and achieve on a higher level in the present moment, but it will also make you a more happy and grounded man.
One of the best ways to expand yourself as a man is to travel. Experience new cultures, explore new ways of life, be open to new world views. Travel will enrich your life in more ways than you can count.
From lifelong relationships, to unforgettable experiences, to simple serenity while you stand in awe at a natural wonder, travel will change your life for the better and will help equip you to live life on a more holistic level.
3. Find Out What You Really Value
It is easy to use cop-out answers to describe our values. Beyond the “I want to change the world” and “I want to leave a legacy” there is a deeper and richer reason to everything that we want and do.
Take time and go deeper into your why. Ask yourself why 5 times, write down your answer, get clear on who you are and what you value and figure out your purpose in life. If you want to live a rich fulfilling life, full of abundance and happiness, you must go beyond the canned cliche values that you have heard and truly determine what it is that gets you out of bed in the morning.
4. Stop Listening to Gurus
Follow your gut and do what will make you happiest, don’t waste time paying attention to well paid speakers telling you how to live your life.
5. Don’t Take Things Seriously
Life is too damn short to go through it with a constant frown. Bad things happen, failures occur, and things don’t go your way, buy all in all none of it matters.
The end result for every human is death, it always has been, and (unless scifi becomes reality) it always will. Don’t waste one more moment of your life than necessary worrying about crap that will be gone tomorrow. Don’t stress over the petty things in life.
Seek to be of service, seek to make an impact, and seek to enjoy what little time you have on this planet. Realize that life is a game, don’t take anything seriously. Laugh off the small stuff and work through the big stuff. Always ask yourself “If I knew I would die tomorrow, would this bother me?”:
Former Air force Captain Bryan Reeves is the Co-founder/Director for The Center for Mindful Education, where he’s taught mindfulness to people with autism. He co-founded “Operation Mindful Warrior” to help bring mindfulness to military veterans (who are currently committing suicide at a shocking rate)
Bryan serves on the Executive Board of the Global Alliance for Transformational Entertainment (G.A.T.E.). Founded by John Raatz, author Eckhart Tolle and actor Jim Carrey, GATE is an organization of entertainment and media companies and professionals – actors, producers, filmmakers, musicians and more – working to influence the entertainment and media industry to produce and distribute transformational content that inspires global audiences for the benefit of all.
Bryan currently resides in L.A. working as a transformational life and relationships coach.
“Follow your highest excitement”~Bryan Reeves
1. It Is Essential That You Learn to Collaborate
We live in a world full of people determined to go it alone. We look at others with differing ideologies, religions, or political standing as lost causes that will never be reached instead of seeking to use our uniqueness together to create something incredible.
Learn to see and bring out the best in people regardless of your differences, learn to work with others and use your differences to create a future that could never have been built alone. Work together with others and create a future that you would be proud to raise a family in.
2. Surround Yourself With People Who Won’t Take Your Crap
As much as we love to surround ourselves with yes men (or women) it is imperative to our personal growth that we are around people who push us and call us out on our bullshit. Build a social circle full of people who aren’t afraid to challenge you and make you uncomfortable.
As Jim Rohn said “You are the average of the five people whom you associate with most.” If you want to live a world class life, then associate with people who will push you in every area.
3. Acknowledge That You Could be Wrong
As you work to build the life and relationships of your dreams, approach every issue with the thought that you might be wrong. Nietzsche, the famous philosopher once said that “Conviction is the enemy of truth.” Never allow your need to be right to blind you to the truth.
Realize that you may be wrong, accept it and look to collaborate with others who can help guide you to the truth.
4. Be a Leader in Your Relationships
As a man, embrace the masculine energy in your relationships and take charge (most of the time). Decide where to go out on a date, set the time, lay down the ground rules of the relationship. Women cannot be fully in their feminine unless you are in your masculine and for this to happen you must be present and taking charge, leading the encounter to new and exciting heights.
5. Success Doesn’t Make the Man
Money, cars, girls, none of it makes you a man. To be a true man, an authentic man, you must be totally fulfilled and in love with yourself. Be who you are, pursue a life of purpose that excites you every morning. Do things because you damn well want to!
Never forsake dreams or aspirations for a paycheck or relationship. Follow your highest excitement, do what makes you happy and impact others while doing it.
6. If You Aren’t Thriving Today It’s Pointless
Goals are amazing. Plans are great. But nothing is certain. Life is a precious gift that can be taken at any moment. Live life in the moment and be passionate about the life you are living today. Because the life you are stressing about creating may not be there tomorrow.
Stephen Alter was born and raised in the Himalayas, where he and his wife, Ameeta, continue to make their home. He is the author of more than fifteen books of fiction and non-fiction, including Sacred Waters: A Pilgrimage to the Many Sources of the Ganga. For ten years, he was a writer-in-residence at MIT and before that, director of the writing program at the American University in Cairo.
His honors include a Guggenheim Fellowship, a Fulbright Research Grant and an honorary degree from Wesleyan University, where he studied as an undergraduate. He is founding director of the Mussoorie Writers’ Mountain Festival, which brings together writers, mountaineers, filmmakers, artists and musicians from around the world to celebrate the heritage of the Himalayas.
1. Live to Fight Another Day
Throughout your life and your own personal journey you will face a number of incredible challenges where you will be faced with two choices: 1) Stand and fight or 2) Live to fight another day.
As masculine and macho as perseverance and facing down impossible odds may sound, it is often wiser to know when to fold. This does not mean quitting. It means pausing, reassessing the situation, and deciding where to move from a place of greater clarity and knowledge
When faced with a huge obstacle in business or finances, you can continue banging your head against a wall that won’t budge. Or you can do the wiser thing. You can momentarily retreat, lick your wounds and come back later with a greater sense of purpose.
2. Understand That You Are a Small Part of a Whole
One of the many benefits of being out in nature, is that you begin to realize just how small you are. The world is full of 7 billion people and trillions of other organisms all fighting to survive. You realize that you are not important.
As depressing as this may sound. It is actually a cause for excitement because it means that you have free reign to dare boldly. No one cares enough about you for failure to be final. People are so caught up in their own concerns that they have very little time to worry about you as well.
This means you are free from the worry of judgement of others. Live life the way you want and don’t worry about what people think. You are a tiny part of a giant universe and at the end of the day it is better to dare boldly, and fail greatly than never to try at all.
3. Use Your Pain as Fuel for Your Story
Everyone suffers some kind of pain in this life. A break up or divorce, loss of a loved one, business failure, personal or moral failure; everyone has something in their life that causes great pain.
Instead of dwelling on this pain and wallowing in self pity, use it. Use your pain as fuel to create the greatest life possible and to share your story so others can avoid your misfortune.
The greatest way to cope with pain is to turn it into a triumph, if you can use it as a way to help others and better the world, not only will you relieve the pain you have felt, but you will save others from ever experiencing it as well.
4. Get in Nature
Spending time out in nature is one of the quickest ways to reconnect you with the earth and with yourself. There is a sense of peace that comes from sitting and meditating beside a quiet stream that is difficult to duplicate.
Some of you may live in a big city with very little immediate access to mountains or the ocean, but even getting outside for 30 minutes a day and walking in the park can be an extremely therapeutic and rejuvenating experience.
5. Seize the Moment
Too often, we focus on seizing the day, the week, the year with little to no thought about the present moment. Be present, intentionally set moments to memory. Live in the present and stay out of your head. Let tomorrow worry about itself.
Jonathan Levi is an experienced entrepreneur, angel investor, and lifehacker from Silicon Valley. After successfully selling his Inc 5,000 rated startup in April of 2011, Levi packed up for Israel to gain experience in the Venture Capital industry.
Levi has been featured in such publications and programs as the Wall Street Journal, Nana10 Television, The Silicon Valley Business Journal, Bimmer Magazine, BMW Blog, and Donna Fenn’s latest book, Upstarts! How GenY Entrepreneurs are Rocking the World of Business and 8 Ways You Can Profit from Their Success, among others.
“The greatest happiness in life is that we are loved. Loved for ourselves or loved in spite of ourselves.”~Victor Hugo
1. Learn to Properly Delegate
Chances are, living the life of your dreams involves you doing a lot more of what you enjoy and a helluva lot less of the things that you don’t. Determine activities in your life that are neither enjoyable nor particularly profitable and delegate them to others.
For example, you can hire a maid to come and clean your house, do your laundry, and even cook your meals for between $20-$50/hour. If you are earning even $5 more per hour by doing this, than you are enhancing your productivity and your dollar per output. It’s a win win for everyone.
2. Do an 80/20 Analysis
Around 20% of what you do in every area of your life will account for 80% of the results that you see. To live a fulfilling and meaningful life, you must determine the things that you are content being in the 80th percentile for, and those that you are willing to invest the extra time into.
Do you want to be a top level bodybuilder, or just be lean and healthy? Do you want to be a Forbes list entrepreneur making millions a year, or just have the income to live life on your terms?
There’s no right or wrong, you simply have to decide what it is you want and allocate your resources properly.
3. Apply the Productivity Mindset to Your Personal Life
Seek to use the productivity mindset in all areas of your life, especially social. For example if you have the choice between going to an entrepreneurs mastermind or going to a club and getting hammered, it’s pretty clear which option will lead to greater results.
Enjoy yourself, party, live life, but make sure that you are filling your life with high caliber social activities as well.
5. Speed Reading Tips
5. Sleep The Every Man Schedule
Sleep 6 hours at night and then take a half hour nap in the middle of the day. This will save you a few hours each day, leave you feeling refreshed and is more congruent with your evolutionary programming.
6. Passive Income is About Freedom
The holy grail of finances is passive income. To be making money while you sleep. What you must realize is that this goal is about freedom and having the options to do what you want. Never forsake options for a paycheck, you can always make more money, but once time leaves, it never comes back.