Zan Perrion is internationally recognized as one of the most original and insightful voices on relationships and seduction in the world today. A regular media commentator, he has been widely featured in the international press.
Zan is the founder of the Ars Amorata philosophy–a celebration of the art of seduction, the rebirth of romance, and a lifelong quest for beauty and adventure. He is also a co-founder of the Amorati network of men and author of The Alabaster Girl
1. The Greatest Seduction is Authenticity
Today, there are a plethora of dating coaches and pickup “gurus” claiming that they have the secret sauce to seduction, the one line that will immediately drop panties and guarantee quick effortless sex.
However, what these so-called gurus do not realize, and where they are doing most men a disservice, is that seduction is all about authenticity. It’s about being who you are, expressing your desire unashamedly and fearlessly. It’s about being willing to open up and share the parts of you that you don’t think women will like.
If you want to be a great seducer and lover, you first have to be authentic, to be the grounded masculine man who knows who he is and what he wants in life and is openly living and expressing that on a daily basis.
Forget all of the cloak and dagger techniques and one-liners, just be real, be you, and be authentic. If a woman can’t appreciate that then she wouldn’t have been a good fit in your life anyways and you save yourself wasted effort on a relationship that would have been built upon a facade.
2. A Great Lover Appreciates the Beauty of All Women
Something many men fail to do is to appreciate the beauty in all women. Sure they appreciate the tan, fit, busty blonde, but they forget to see the beauty in every woman they come into contact with.
Any time you are talking to a girl, whether you are sexually interested or not, try to find something beautiful about her and express it. Maybe it is her smile, her body, her eyes or dress, or maybe it’s the way she laughs, her passion, her kindness, her gentle spirit.
There is beauty in everyone if we will just look, and the world would be a far better place if more people were able to see and acknowledge the beauty within every person with whom they interact.
3. A Boy Looks for What He Can Get a Man Looks for What He Can Share
The true difference between, a boy and a man is simply the focus they have.
A boy looks for what he can get; sex, money, prestige, status, fulfillment etc etc. a man, however, looks for what he can give. He comes into every interaction looking for ways to lift others up and to share himself, to make others feel beautiful and loved.
A man is content in himself and doesn’t need the validation of others. He is already full, and as a result he can pour out into others lives without holding back.
4. There is Great Beauty in Women if You Continue
Many guys have been screwed over by women. We have opened ourselves up and put ourselves on the line only to be burned and hurt.
After this, we became jaded and angry, stereotyping all women as mean and deceitful, failing to realize that like all other generalizations, one isolated incident does not account for a whole populations actions.
If you want to be successful with women and in life in general, you must realize that there is great beauty if you will just continue. Yes, there are women who are simply mean and hurtful, but the vast majority are beautiful creatures, incredible treasure chests of beauty just waiting for the right guy who can come along and unlock them.
So keep going, keep being authentic and keep searching for the beauty in all women and you will find it. Like the bible says (and this is applicable regardless of you religious beliefs or lack thereof) “Seek and you shall find, ask and it will be given, knock and the door will be opened. ”
Keep seeking, asking and knocking and you will find more satisfaction and deep intimacy than you ever thought possible.
5. It’s Not About the Move You Make Just That You Make a Move
Just make a move. Stop worrying about doing the right thing and just do something.
So many guys never have success in any area of their life because they are afraid of taking imperfect action, but what they fail to realize is that no action is perfect and the only way to be successful is to continually experiment, fail, learn, and experiment again.
Don’t be afraid to fail, be afraid not to try.